Read Egghead: Or, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone by Bo Burnham Online


Like a lost, twisted work of Shel Silverstein, EGGHEAD is an aggressively charming, hilarious and absurd book from one of today's most popular young comedians. EGGHEADOr, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone Bo Burnham was a precocious teenager living in his parents' attic in Massachusetts when he started posting funny songs to YouTube. More than 100 million people viewed thosLike a lost, twisted work of Shel Silverstein, EGGHEAD is an aggressively charming, hilarious and absurd book from one of today's most popular young comedians. EGGHEADOr, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone Bo Burnham was a precocious teenager living in his parents' attic in Massachusetts when he started posting funny songs to YouTube. More than 100 million people viewed those videos, turning Bo into an online sensation with a huge and dedicated following. Writer/producer Judd Apatow championed the young comedian, and Bo taped his first Comedy Central special at age 18, the youngest in the channel's history. Now Bo is a rising star in the comedy world, revered for his utterly original and highly intelligent voice. In EGGHEAD, his first book, Bo brings his brand of brainy comedy to the page in the form of off-kilter writings, thoughts, poems, and more. Teaming up with his longtime friend--artist and illustrator Chance Bone (real name)--Bo takes on everything from painful breakups to bald barbers. This weird and witty collection will have readers and fans laughing out loud and/or giggling quietly....

Title : Egghead: Or, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 18831067
Format Type : Kindle Edition
Number of Pages : 240 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

Egghead: Or, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone Reviews

  • Nat
    2019-02-06 11:37

    I've been eyeing this particular collection for awhile now and after having read it, I feel mad at myself for taking so long to pick it up. Egghead is nothing short of spectacular.The basic premise is that it's a strange and charming collection of hilariously absurd poetry, writing, and illustration from one of today's most popular young comedians...And as you might know by now, I love poetry books with illustrations... so this was it for me.Here are a few (okay... a lot...) of my favorite poems from Egghead:Convenience “I would do anything for you,if convenient.I would move a mountain for youif that mountain could be movedwith a button or with a lever thatwasn’t too cold to the touch.I would give you the moon if I could.You would love the moon. You wouldshow it off to everyone and not give a fuckthat you’ve now severely damaged our ecosystem by disrupting the tides.Maybe a nice look in the mirror is in order, Missy. ”Magic“Read this to yourself. Read it silently. Don’t move your lips. Don’t make a sound. Listen to yourself. Listen without hearing anything. What a wonderfully weird thing, huh?NOW MAKE THIS PART LOUD! SCREAM IT IN YOUR MIND! DROWN EVERYTHING OUT. Now, hear a whisper. A tiny whisper.Now, read this next line with your best crotchety- old-man voice: “Hello there, sonny. Does your town have a post office?”Awesome! Who was that? Whose voice was that?It sure wasn’t yours!How do you do that? How?! Must be magic.”This was the poem that initially made me interested in picking up this collection!On Poets and Farts“Why do poets always talk about the ocean’s waves,about their single file march to shore,and yet never talk about my grandmother’s farts,which arrive in time, one after the other, with equal regularity?Are these poets too holy to comment on anything less than nature’s flashiest gestures?
Are we going to spend another millennia searchingfor meaning in sunsets and waterfalls?
Or will we finally turn our ear to Grammy’s rump and away from all that pretty stuff,
and hear that foul, muted trumpet sing,
marking the end of an era?”I actually laughed out loud at this for so long. Why do I do this to myself??Flowers “On the third of June, at a minute past two, where once was a person, a flower now grew.Five daisies arranged on a large outdoor stagein front of a ten-acre pasture of sage.
In a changing room, a lily poses.
At the DMV, rows of roses.
The world was much crueler an hour ago.
I’m glad someone decided to give flowers a go.”Hell Waits Screen“Hell waits in a doctor’s office,tapping his shoe against a loose strip of carpet, holding a magazine in front of his face,trying to look professional,whilst eyeing the children’s toys.”Alfred “You’re a bunny, Alfred.Quit all this “elephant” bullshit.Look at your little bunny ears.Look at your adorable whiskers.Do elephants have little bunny ears? Do they have adorable whiskers?No, they don’t.You can’t just wake up one dayand decide to be an elephant, Alfred. The world doesn’t work like that. There are rules, Alfred.And you want to stomp all over them. Get over yourself.”You“How, may I ask, did you get so you,
you beautiful true-to-you doer?
I’ve met many today but can honestly say that I’ve never met anyone you-er.”The Flirt “I could make an easy joke to get you laughing. Something about a cat and then the word pussy being used ambiguously.I could tell a sad story to get you crying. Like how I had a single motherwho started selling handmade yo-yosto support her only child.I could tell you an interesting fact to get you nodding,Like how carpets were first made in the hopes that all of the world’s grasswould one day be replaced by carpets, or, as they called them, “comfy grass.”I could tell you a scary story to get your teeth chattering,Something about a really old man, sitting in a squeaky rocking chair, pointing at you.What are you in the mood for?”I actually felt everything he said I would.Incomparable“You’re incomparable like a...Shit.Like a...”Advice “If the poem you’re writing is silly and dumb,make sure that it rhymes at the end. Bum.”Count of Six “I’ll give you till the count of six.One. Now run! Two.
Go screw! Three.
Let me be! Four. There’s the door! Five.
While I’m still alive! Six. Please stay, I love you.”...“I’m a nihilist.A complete and perfect nihilist.Life has no meaning. No point.
Happiness is a chemical coincidence and nothing else (still“else” though nothing to begin with).
Value is a vast vault of black,
a black that dictates lack.Oh, and that accidental rhyme just then meant nothing.Why are you color-coding things?
What’s the point, fascist?For more, check out my blog.”They “Well, man, you know what they say.”No, I don’t. I don’t know what they say.I don’t even know who they are.Who is this they?They seem pretty smug.They seem to think they know shit.Fuck them.”Donald “No matter our race or color or creedor way of life or species or breed.No matter our height or girth or scent,we all hate Donald because Donald is a fucking dick.” Ashley “Little Ashley hung magazine spreads on her wall, after picking the magazines out in the mall. Models and actresses, singers and more,
with cleavage and makeup and glamour galore!All of her heroes were finally nearer. Her whole room looked perfect—except for the mirror.”This one was surprisingly deep.Be Patient “Be patient, be patient.Rome wasn’t built in a day.It wasn’t built at all, in fact.Rome self-assembled in reactionto the people’s unwavering patience.So be patient, be patient.”Change“I don’t expectto change your mindwith one conversation,only to chip away at it,like a woodpecker on a redwood tree.” Up Above “From my window seat, the world looks so tiny, the cities so adorably ordered.
Makes me realize just how insignificant people are and just how godlike I am.” Roller Coaster “Our love was a roller coaster.It had ups and downs and I sat real close to her.It had a real slow climb and a real quick drop.I screamed “faster” and she begged it to stop.I put up my hands and she held on tight.Not a second of boredom on our rickety flight.And when it came to a stop at that first safer place,I said, “Let’s do it again,” and she puked in my face.” Her Eyes “Her eyes were like fire.They weren’t red or anything.Not particularly warm, either.They didn’t glow or “appear to glow,”whatever that means.But they had that same strange blend of familiar and miraculous—and they were always nice to look at after a long day of doing things.” This collection managed to, among many other feelings, make me laugh out loud multiple times, which I really, really needed.I loved Egghead and after I finished reading I had to listen to my favorite Bo Burnham song again:Two quotes in particular from the song always get to me:“The world's so sad, brosPain, genocide, war, sexism, racismBut I gotta remember there's good things about it tooLike the fact that none of that's happening to me, score!”&“The world isn't sad. The world's funny! I'm a sociopath!”*Note: I'm an Amazon Affiliate. If you're interested in buying Egghead, just click on the image below to go through my link. I'll make a small commission!*This review and more can be found on my blog.

  • Whitney Atkinson
    2019-02-11 16:38

    I am in love with Bo Burnham. His show "what." blows my mind every single time and his YouTube is absolutely genius. As a human being, I admire him so, so, so much, not just for his jokes, but for his painfully accurate social commentary. I've had my eye on this book for a long, long time and finally found it on bookoutlet (score!) and read it in one sitting. I gotta say, he gave away the best ones during his comedy show, and the rest weren't as good so I felt a little cheated. But regardless, "I Fuck Sluts" will be forever great, and I also discovered that I really liked "Ants" and "Time Blows."I think these jokes/puns would have come across better spoken aloud rather than in a book, tbh.

  • Khadidja
    2019-02-21 18:41

    This dude is really funny i loved this silly funny poemsAdviceIf the poem you’re writing is silly and dumb,make sure that it rhymes at the end. Bum. this one is my favorite LOL On Poets and FartsWhy do poets always talk about the ocean’s waves,about their single file march to shore,and yet never talk about my grandmother’s farts,which arrive in time, one after the other, with equal regularity

  • Melki
    2019-02-23 15:42

    My oldest son asked for this for his birthday. Anytime either kid asks for a book, I don't care if it's The Colossal Treasury of Porn, I'm probably going to buy the thing because I'm so thrilled that he's asking for a book. (See Naked Girls Smoking Weed: Best of 420 Girls.)This book looks and feels like Where the Sidewalk Ends for grown-ups (or those who refuse to grow up.) Each page contains a poem accompanied by a drawing, though that's pretty much where the similarity ends. I got very few chuckles out of this one, though I suspect Burnham's fans will love it. My favorite?Your MomIf I had a million dollars, I would pay your motherto have sex with me.Afterward, I would probably invest the remainingnine hundred ninety-nine thousand nine hundred ninety dollars.Burrrrrrn.

  • Raeleen Lemay
    2019-01-31 13:25

    Let me just say something here. I LOVE BO BURNHAM. He is my spirit animal. If you don't know who he is, look him up on YouTube, Vine, even Netflix. I SWEAR HE IS THE SMARTEST PERSON THERE IS. His comedy show and this book are filled with his quick wit and kind heart. However, I found that a few of the poems in this book didn't entirely make sense or have any humour to them, which confused me a bit, but the majority of the poems are hilarious and/or cute and heartwarming. Bo has an amazing ability to make you expect a certain outcome for something, but then change it completely on its head and surprise you. I LOVE THAT. His comedic style is very sporadic and wild, and I highly recommend you check him out. Also, the poem I Fuck Sluts is in here and it's just as good written down as when Bo recites it.Bo's comedy special "what."

  • Iris
    2019-02-01 11:28

    Amazing and DeepBut also lightheartedBo burnham's a genius Even when he farted

  • Roxanne
    2019-01-31 18:22

    First read of 2014 and it was majestic. If you like Bo you won't be disappointed, start reading it now. If you don't know who he is and you're a fan of macabre art...probably leave it, but then lighten up, you miserable fuck you might like this book.

  • Alan
    2019-02-08 11:35

    I think that almost every lineof Egghead's like Shel Silverstein.Or maybe I should say I meanThe drawings are like Silverstein.But whether I say -stine or -steen,I do think Burnham's pretty keen.Though be advised that (just like Shel),A lot of Egghead's raw as hell.

  • Stef
    2019-02-13 15:35

    3.5 stars! I've read books that are in verse (well maybe just one but yeah). They usually follow a plot line and the story unfolds and all BUT Egghead's different. There isn't any story, each poem is something different. Sure there are use of vulgar words but they make each poem funnier. I would read the start of one poem and think it's romantic but I get to end of it and realize the whole thing was just a joke. Bo Burnham's head from pointing out something we don't realize to just putting whatever what was in mind. It's refreshing to see a book that goes in that direction. My friend lent me her copy and told me that by the end of this book, I'll cry because books like these don't really exist. And she was right, I felt like sobbing because I wanted more of comedic insanity. It was a pleasure to read. One of my favorites has got to be the "I Fuck Sluts" poem, it doesn't sound nice if you look at the name but it goes in a deep direction. Ahahaha. But yes, Bo Burnham can make you laugh with Egghead.

  • India
    2019-01-24 11:22

    Such a fun read! A lot of the poetry was really silly and even some of the serious stuff had a silliness to it, which is sometimes good. It’s nice to laugh at things you normally take really seriously.

  • Belén
    2019-02-02 11:43

    Quería dejarlo que se asiente antes de hacer una review porque sentía que si lo hacía ese día iba a darle 5 estrellas sin pensarlo solo porque amo a Bo.La verdad es que el libro estuvo bien porque me reí bastante con algunos poemas pero no me pareció la gran cosa, es más, no se si lo leería devuelta. Le doy tres estrellas por las ilustraciones porqueDIOS MIO LOS DIBUJOS ERAN SAR-PA-DOS , como el de ahí arriba.Este fue uno de los que más disfruté porque fue chilling (el texto, no el el dibujo)

  • Erin
    2019-02-16 17:35

    This book is reminds me a lot of the work of Shel Silverstein’s poetry, but with adults as the intended audience. Even the artwork reminds me of “Where the Sidewalk Ends”. This book is funny and at times crude. Overall a fun read.

  • Lucas
    2019-02-15 10:18

    I am utterly and completely torn on how to review this, so I'm going to do something I don't typically do and form a pros and cons list.Pros:• The pages are nice and thick. I don't know about anyone else, but that's just something I fancy.• Some of the poetry is funny, and a piece of good, funny poetry can sometimes be hard to come by.• Some of the pieces are thought-provoking and bring up very valid points about consumerism, relationships, and life in general. Honestly, when the poems are on point, they are seriously on point. That, alone, despite the rest of the review and the rating I settled on, made me want to give this book five stars.Cons:• Some of the poems require the art in the book to finish the joke; I don't like that. There's nothing wrong with the art enhancing the quality of the work, but I don't care for the fact that, without the picture, the poem couldn't stand on its own.• Some of the poetry is just plain stupid.• The book, as a whole, is more comedian-like work than pure, raw poetry. And that's not completely unexpected because it is, in fact, a comedian who wrote it, but I'm not really sure it should be labeled as a "poetry" book.Overall, I chose two stars because, while some of the work is gripping, most of it falls short. Don't get me wrong, I was a fan of Bo Burnham long before he started writing this; I just think, given some of the things he's come up with in the past, this could have been so much better than it was. That being said, he probably meant it to be exactly the way it is. I give him props for creating a book that is a nearly perfect representation of himself.

  • Vanessa
    2019-02-18 11:16

    Oh, Bo, your comedy strikes me again. This book is something to read on a rainy day and just laugh your ass off. It will even will tickle your soft spots.If you aren't familiar with the author, you should be. Bo is one of the most intelligent and hilarious comedians of our time. Others like Kevin Hart don't even compare. You don't even have to appreciate poetry to enjoy this book.Once I saw this in stores, I screamed internally out of joy. It's not just a bunch of It's comical genius. This book is just Bo, yo. Period.

  • Clare
    2019-02-16 10:32

    If it weren't for the fact that Bo Burnham wrote this, I probably would have never read it. I don’t read much poetry but this was great. This is such a witty and hilarious read and the drawings are great. Not only were most of his poems hilarious, some were adorable that would make you grin from ear to ear. Even if you're not a fan of poetry, I would recommend picking this book up.One of my favorite poems from this book is“I love you just the way you are but you don’t see you like I do. You shouldn’t try to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.”

  • Emma McArdle
    2019-02-08 15:21

    One of those books that deserves a buy. With poems and jokes that can take up to 4 reads to fully understand, reading it multiple times is a must. Its pages aren't numbered so it hints to me to not needed to be read in order, especially not after the first time. find each time I read the book I have new favorite poem. I would also recommend his special "What." on youtube(free)or Netflix, it's hilarious and will introduce you to his comedy. Although even if you don't completely share his humor, I would say more than half of the book is more serious and not as silly as he is on stage.

  • Stacy Fetters
    2019-02-04 13:37

    "Sure you're perfect, But are you cool?"Everyone under the sun has recommended this book to me, well because I'm an asshole who just doesn't give a fuck. I've seen Bo's youtube videos and hes one of the only people who understands comedy in this butt hurt century. They're dark and twisted with a sprinkle of wacky. This book is no different. Laughing from page one.... And a word of advice.... "Don't dance with your colon full!"

  • Amber
    2019-02-12 13:28

    quick read as it is a book of poetry. I do think the message in some would have been relayed better vocally, but that is how I feel about most poetry. I did mostly enjoy this compilation because I enjoy Bo Burnham, but I did enjoy the artist's drawings a lot as they fit the poems amazingly.

  • Jennifer Girard
    2019-02-16 16:20

    3.5Honestly I was expecting it to be funnier. Maybe I didn't get some of the poems? I don't know... I laughed a few times but not like I was expecting.

  • Hristina
    2019-02-15 11:46

    This book is so funny. From truths pointed out, to so many original ideas executed perfectly, I loved every bit of it. I even sat down and watched Bo Burnham's one-man-shows. He is hilarious, in this book of poetry too.

  • Lex Javier
    2019-01-30 11:43

    One good poem in a whole book."I love you just the way you arebut you don't see you like I do.You shouldn't try so hard to be perfect.Trust me, perfect should try to be you."The rest are poems that tend to be written by navel-gazing, self-indulgent types.

  • Ally Doerman
    2019-01-29 13:21

    I love Bo Burnham's music and stand up, but this book just didn't reach my expectations. It was not funny. It was, for lack of better words, stupid. Such a bummer.

  • Ella
    2019-02-11 12:26

    Mr. Woodmansee, you don't want to read this one.Great compilation. There are a few poems that aren't very good, but overall the poems by Bo Burnham are everything I expect from him. My all-time favorite is one about reading:MagicRead this to yourself. Read it silently.Don't move your lips. Don't make a sound.Listen to yourself. Listen without hearing anything.What a wonderfully weird thing, huh?NOW MAKE THIS PART LOUD!SCREAM IT IN YOUR MIND!DROWN EVERYTHING OUT!Now, hear a whisper. A tiny whisper.Now, read this next line with your best crotchety-old-man voice:"Hello there, sonny. Does your town have a post office?"Awesome! Who was that? Whose voice was that?It sure wasn't yours!How do you do that?How?!Must be magic.Great book. 4/5 stars

  • Alex
    2019-01-28 10:44

    Bo Burnham's Egghead: Or, You Can't Survive on Ideas Alone is a quick read full of carefully thought out words placed nicely on paper (and some pretty spectacular images). If you loved Shel Silverstein when you were 11 years old, you'll love Egghead as an adult. This book has it all. If you're a Bo Burnham fan, you can feel his personality and his comedy in some of the poems. But then, you'll turn the page, and there's something completely different, new. Burnham has this amazing ability to be inspiring, stupid, crude (Yes, I just said the word crude in a POETRY review), playful and witty all at once. If your a poetry fan, you'll understand what this is about. You'll see the satire and the real life connections and the reason behind it all. You'll understand his writing style and appreciate the words and where they appear on the page. And let me just commend Chance Bone on his artwork. Wowzers. That's some real good drawing skills. I will definitely be reading this again, and possibly taking a pen or highlighter to the pages and marking my favourite places, something I only do with poetry books. Enjoy!

  • Katie
    2019-02-06 15:42

    I feel. very 'eh' about this collection. I bought it, of course, as a fan of Bo's, but I don't know what exactly I was expecting. Whatever it was, this wasn't it. Egghead is, in a way, very similar to Bo's stand-up routines, which I don't particularly like most about his acts. I mean, I won't rate it two stars because I don't feel disappointed, I just feel like the poems are something I'll forget about five minutes from now. I did bookmark a few of my favourites- six, in fact- but the remainder of the poems were mediocre at best.Don't be mad at me Bo, I do love your acts and I totally get the irony behind a lot of your jokes but it's definitely not as impacting coming from the page.Note: "I Fuck Sluts" is definitely my favourite of the collection, mostly because of the volta.

  • Erica Hatch
    2019-02-01 15:37

    When I'm asked who my favorite comedian is, Bo Burnham is the one that comes to mind immediately. I love his his songs, his comedy shows, and now- his poetry! I loved that I could read these poems in Bo's voice. A few I remembered from some of his stand up shows. Unfortunately, a few of the poems I just didn't understand. But I loved most of them!These poems are a lovely mix- funny, thought-provoking, sad, political, raw, heartwarming, dark... I loved how Bo's writing can draw you right in, but then takes a twist that catches you totally by surprise. And the drawings by Chance Bone were lovely!

  • Marianna
    2019-01-27 11:40

    Bo Burnham is truly a gift to humanity. His poems are incredibly smart, hilarious and thought-provoking. Along with his incredible imagination and Chance's illustrations they make this book a great read. I also highly recommend his show "What" which to be honest is the best stand up i've ever watched.

  • Christa
    2019-01-25 17:17

    I was expecting a lot of silly Shel-Silverstein-like jokes laced with profanity, and this did not disappoint. But even better: there were random ones that were THOUGHTFUL and lovely and Bo, you dog, you. It was a quick read, which was something that I needed to get me out of a reading slump I'd been collapsed in, and this book of short poems was the perfect refresher for me.

  • Rossy
    2019-02-22 10:32

    I liked 2 or 3 poems, the rest was superfluous and not likable at all.

  • Ingrid
    2019-02-24 10:28

    Absurd poetry + creative use of words + some lovely poems + fitting artwork = another great thing that makes you think, created by Bo Burnham :)