Read The Accidental Human by Dakota Cassidy Online

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Immortality bites- new from the author of Accidentally Dead and The Accidental Werewolf. Wanda Schwartz is raking in the dough selling Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics-and she's a pro at recruiting new saleswomen. So, she's shocked when a man comes to one of her in-home parties-a very hot man. Heath Jefferson is sure to put some extra spin into a lot of women's color wheels. When WandImmortality bites- new from the author of Accidentally Dead and The Accidental Werewolf. Wanda Schwartz is raking in the dough selling Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics-and she's a pro at recruiting new saleswomen. So, she's shocked when a man comes to one of her in-home parties-a very hot man. Heath Jefferson is sure to put some extra spin into a lot of women's color wheels. When Wanda is diagnosed with a terminal illness, it doesn't have to be a death sentence. With a werewolf and a vampire for best friends, she has options that most ordinary people wouldn't. As Wanda ponders what to do about her mortality, Heath reveals he has secrets, and one of them is that his former bloodlust has turned into an old-fashioned lust-for Wanda. And he's already given up too much to lose the love of his lifetimes....

Title : The Accidental Human
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 9780425225950
Format Type : Paperback
Number of Pages : 343 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

The Accidental Human Reviews

  • Julie (jjmachshev)
    2019-02-03 22:01

    I laughed, I cried, and I smiled. "The Accidental Human" is Dakota Cassidy's final novel in her 'Accidental' series and it's a great ending to a series that combines heaping doses of humor, hot sex, and paranormal happily ever afters.Wanda is the peacemaker of her two friends. They all met when they signed up to sell Bobbie-Sue cosmetics. Nina, the brash one, was accidentally made a vampire; and Marty, the go-getter, was accidentally bitten by a werewolf. So now Wanda is the lone human who still spends her time refereeing between the two others in their crazy trio. Wanda still sells Bobbie-Sue, she even got a car, and she credits her lists for helping her make all the important decisions and keep her life on track. But the one thing that never came up in her lists is what to do if you're diagnosed with a terminal disease. And wouldn't you know it, fate picks NOW to have her meet the man of her (and pretty much anyone's) dreams. What to do? Make a list! And make having wild and fantastic sex her number one 'to do' before she dies.Even with all the humor, the tight bond between these three women shines through in their stories. Wanda's hopes and fears are entirely realistic, even when set in Cassidy's crazy paranormal world. I want to have drinks with these three...and trash men while we do it. Then go home and do the 'wild thing' with my hubby and plan to meet again next week to out-brag the others! The author threw in a couple of twists that I wasn't expecting, and they certainly increased my enjoyment of her story. I really did laugh out loud, and I really did cry (my hubby wanted to know if I was OK) as I read about Wanda's choices and the decisions she had to make. The ending was surprising and wonderful and all three of these books are headed for my groaning keeper shelf.

  • Sally
    2019-01-30 20:59

    I need to preface this by saying this is my opinion only. It's based on my own preferences and I have a lot of friends who enjoy similar books to me who loved it. I'm glad to have read these books in that I gleefully passed them all on to one of these friends and she's enjoyed them very much. We're all different. So take my comments on board and make your own decision. I've tried to explain the issues I had clearly so you can make your own mind up whether they'd bother you or not.But boy was I glad to finish this one. The plot focussed on the third of the trio of irritating, image focussed (barring the hyper agressive annoying one from the second book) women, who met through a pyramid style make up company. Like the first two in the series, I wanted to like it more than I did because there are a few paragraphs of beautiful writing but sadly most of it was not.As I said with the first book, I really like that the author tries to take the piss out of so many accepted concepts but it falls flat in my opinion. In this book, not only is there the annoying trendy but horrible expression to deal with, there is another hero with apalling judgement in women. As wish fulfillment fantasy it might work for rude, mean women but I harbour a secret desire that some men might still like polite and reasonable women too. Also, when the men fall for the women's great complexions or other such physical features in the face of a horrible personality it cheapens them in my opinion.I felt as though a thesaurus had been consulted a la a year nine essay. For example the word "conversated" was used in one awful sentence where the straightforward word "talk" would have fit much better. The various flicking, tugging and kneading that passed as foreplay also reminded me more of the fumblings going on in the shadowed corners of a year nine formal, than what could be expected of sex between a mature couple but more of that later.The heroine here is pretty bloody selfish, even compared with the previous two. This was wonderfully pointed out by second books aggro protagonist, when she quite reasonably yells in her face "What the fuck kind of friend are you?". There were hints about an undefined terminal illness throughout most of the book, so it was a relief to find out just what type of cancer she had when it finally came out. The heorine is also irritatingly rambling in her speech.Frequently there are expressions implying that a woman with unvarnished nails, less than perfect make up or unshaved legs is unattractive and I found myself wondering if the author is in league with those bastards who sell beauty products by convincing women that we are ugly without their unique and expensive brand of help.The word fuck is freely bandied around, except when it comes to sex which is referred to as "wonking". I can only imagine it's some sort of woeful cross between wanking and bonking because wonk certainly doesn't mean sex. The author seems to be able to say cock and clit but not pussy (I suppose fanny wouldn't work in a US book). The woman's pussy becoms her "sex", another popular fad I hate. Her "folds" were also referred to in a way that made me think of a Shar-Pei. Euphemisms in general apall me and they abound here. I'm tempted to enter this book into the "Bad sex in fiction" awards for next year.Sex is referred to as both naughty and sinful by the heroine, and there are other Biblical tendencies, something I find weird in a supernatural themed book, but I guess there's a paying audience to pander to. Worse for me, though the heroine had been married and divorced, evidently she had never orgasmed until she met the sexually magnificent and well endowed hero, so it seems women who don't orgasm are the new virgins. Of course that left the hero with his many, many decades as a player to educate her sexually, a concept I'm also thoroughly sick of. Additionally, though she was previously inorgasmic, it takes a mere few thrusts of the hero's mighty cock for her to come for the first time ever. Furthermore, the sex is described clinically without referring sensibly to the organs involved, another thing that irritates me no end. The whole plot was terribly predictable after the first two books and I'm sad because initially the concept seemed really fresh and fun to me. I only read this book because I bought it with the first two based on a recommendation. I won't bother with the fourth unless it's forced down my throat.

  • Steph
    2019-02-17 23:54

    I liked this book best out of the ones in the series so far.

  • TheGeekyBlogger
    2019-02-11 19:06

    Read for Fun/Listened for Review (Paperback/Tantor)Overall Rating: 4.25Story Rating: 4.00Character Rating: 4.50Audio Rating: 4.00 (not part of the overall rating)First Thought when Finished: Still really enjoying my 2nd visit to this series! I still teared up again in The Accidental Human by Dakota Cassidy the second time around.Original Review from 2010:What I Loved: Almost everything about this book. It made me laugh, cry, and want to tag along for the ride. Wanda grew so much during this book that it was hard not to love her! There is one scene between Wanda, Nina, and Marty that had me bawling like a baby. Dang you Dakota Cassidy!What I Liked: I really liked all the funny moments, most of which were brought to us by the manservent extraordinaire. I also appreciated bringing all 3 couples together at the end so you could see how different they all really were!What I though was So-So/Didn't Like: Not a darn thing!Why I gave it 4: Ok so this book was a close 5 for me. The only reason I gave it a 4 instead is because I wanted a little more of the end scene with them all gathered together. I would say that is a spoiler but ummmm we are reading a romance LOL.Who I would recommend it too: PNR readers who enjoy some snark :)2014 Audio ReviewAudio Thoughts: Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell /Length: 10 hrs and 42 mins Meredith is so growing on me as the series continues! I really think Wanda's voice is the one she has always been spot on with and she delivered on this one. I am looking forward to how she pulls off Casey.Final Thoughts: It is always fun revisiting favorite characters!

  • Cathy
    2019-02-03 16:54

    Somewhat more substantive than the first two in the series. Maybe because the emotional crisis of the main character is more relatable, since I can imagine how it would feel to be told I was dying more easily than being told I'd become a werewolf or a vampire. But I'm guessing it's also because the author had a friend who really did die of the same disease. She doesn't say that, but book 2's dedication said something encouraging to a friend who was clearly ill (I noticed but don't remember the exact words) and this one mentions a friend who's fight was well fought and encourages all women to see their docs and protect their health. So I was reading into it a bit, but there was certainly a bit more story this time. But... it would have been better served with at least 1/3 to 1/2 less chicklit banter. You know, the witty wordplay found in womens lit books that are oversized and cost twice as much as regular paperbacks? I like fun wordplay, but it's really overdone in this series and especially in this book. Wanda is presented as a formerly conservative sweater-set type, so words like sistah and evah just don't feel appropriate or funny. It's just too too much. That said, the romance is sweet, and the relationship between the 3 friends is the heart of the series. Good rainy day books that I din regret reading, but not keepers for me.

  • Melissa Darnold
    2019-01-20 20:08

    Dakota Cassidy continues to surprise me. Normally her spiel is sarcastic, light-hearted love stories with some steamy sex and a happy ending. Now, we get most of this in The Accidental Human. However, she chose to touch on a very sensitive subject; cancer. I'm not sure why; I'm appreciative that she did. It makes Wanda and Heath's meeting bittersweet, but that much more joyful at the end of the book. This is hands-down the most serious in tone in the series, but I feel that this is fitting, seeing as how this is Wanda's story, and she's the most serious and maternal of them all. Really, this book was a good one. It fits into the series well and lends a seriousness that is dealt with in maturity and grace.

  • Jennifer Y
    2019-01-26 21:06

    I'm DNF this one. I just don't like Wanda & Health as characters much less care about them as a couple. I'll skip ahead to the next book.

  • Berls
    2019-02-10 16:57

    Better. Easily my favorite of the series so far. The humor is starting to feel a lot less forced, for one. I think the character felt a lot more authentic and even though there was still that annoying emphasis on swearing, it felt more appropriate in this character. I think it really helped that the subject matter was deeper - we're dealing with serious illness and that just lends itself to a better book I think. It really brought the friendship to a new and interesting height. I read it much faster and was much more eager to see how things would develop... who was the accidental human and how? What would happen to fix things? I was actually concerned which was great. Oh and I loved Heath and his man servant. Great characters. I did have one major frustration - either Cassidy or Wanda need to read a lot more paranormal. At the end, so this is a spoiler sort of - we see the introduction of a brand new-to-them paranormal species. But if you read paranormal like I do, or like wanda supposedly does, you know what that species is called and a little bit about it. Well the name they give is WRONG and what it's capable of is WRONG. Which fine, create a new lore. But I prefer that to be in acknowledgement of it's newness. So that bugged me. Also this felt like a series ender - so now I'm really thrown as to where the series goes after this. I know we've got lots more books. Curious to see! Loved the narration as always :)

  • Fangs for the Fantasy
    2019-02-18 15:59

    Wanda has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer and has been given six months to live. Unlike her supernatural friends Marty and Nina, Wanda has not had the luck of meeting a supernatural lover and so decides that it's time to get her affairs in order, so as not to burden her friends and family when she is gone. Enter the very human Heath Jefferson. Heath is down on his luck and very much in need of a job and so decides to answer Wanda's ad for a make up sales person. First, Heath must convince Wanda that even though he is a man, he can sell makeup to women and then when he discovers his attraction to her, Heath has to find a way to make Wanda admit her attraction to him as well. The clock is ticking though, and with only a few months left to live, Wanda has to consider whether its fair to lead Heath on, though he just might be the love of her life.The Accidental Human is a bit of a relief after reading Accidentally Dead, which had Nina as the protagonist. Wanda is thoughtful, conservative, and an obsessive list maker. Learning of her impending death causes Wanda to step outside of her comfort zone. Unfortunately, Wanda is another gently used protagonist, so part of her dealing with her impending death, is to attempt to have a friends with benefits relationship with Heath. Wanda also begins to swear freely for the first time and even calls her childhood bully to tell him off. For the most part, Wanda is enjoyable.I still found myself cringing with every scene Nina appeared in. Nina continues to be hostile and angry for the sake of giving the appearance of toughness and ends up being a distraction each time she appears. I like that Wanda is the glue which holds the friendship between her, Marty and Nina together. At the end of the day, despite their differences, these women really care about each other and make their relationship a priority despite the hectic nature of their lives. I really like that Nina encourages Wendy to have sex and take of her "womanly needs", without any kind of shame. The love interest in The Accidental Human is Heath, a former vampire. Heath wakes up one day to find that he is human after two hundred years and all of his earthly possessions have disappeared because they were all the result of magic. With his manservant at his side, Heath is determined to embrace his sudden humanity, though it means sleeping in a homeless shelter while searching for a way for a job. Having been turned down from various fast food placed and Walmart, the prospects look grim. If this is Cassidy's version of attempting to introduce class into the Accidentals series, it fails miserably. Heath mentions that it is difficult to stay clean and yet, beyond this statement of fact, he is always impeccably groomed. Because of his sudden poverty, Heath is forced to eat things like Ramen Noodles and Spam, yet is overjoyed by this diet because he finally has the opportunity to eat food after two hundred years. He only vaguely mentions gaining weight because of his diet and never discusses how a diet lacking in things like fiber, fruit and vegetable and high in sugar and starch, can leave one unhealthy and without energy.When Heath calls about a job selling Bobbie-Sue makeup products, and Wanda expresses doubt about his ability to sell, he invokes gender discrimination. This is meant to be used for a laugh because it perplexes Wanda because she cannot understand why a man would want to step outside of society's rigid gender roles and sell makeup, despite the fact that Heath goes to great lengths to make it clear that he needs a job. This bit of role reversal with Wanda being Heath's boss and Heath invoking gender discrimination for laughs really didn't work for me at all.In terms of inclusion, it really The Accidental Human is a hot mess. There is tons of speculation regarding Heath's sexual orientation by Wanda and her friends. This is followed by constant assurance that not only is Heath heterosexual, he is so uber confident in his masculinity because he can sell makeup at a Trans America pageant and doesn't get upset when the contestants come on to him. Really? No, really? Naturally, Heath breaks a Bobbi-Sue record selling to the contestants and all this because he is supposedly so progressive when it comes to gender.Read More

  • Zel Polev
    2019-02-01 18:52

    This book would be great if Wanda wasn't so selfish. Of course, Keith would be understanding and would bend over backwards to be her other half. I've noticed this trend in the other books in the series too. I think the selfish or hypocritical actions stop the books from being great. As it is, the book is just alright. Wanda knew she was dying. It doesn't stop her from pursuing Keith though. I think it is alright to distance yourself so that you can have time for yourself to ponder your mortality. What I don't think is okay is getting someone emotionally involved knowing that you are dying. I thought it was super selfish of her and left a bad taste in the book. I get that she tried to fend him off but once they actually got together, she did not confess. Instead, she had the cake and tried to eat it too. She brushed off his pretty blatant hint of deeper feelings not even considering what her death will be like to others. I really disliked it and it smacked of excusing herself from accountability because she would die soon. It did not speak well of her character. She was on her way to reach a tolerable level when she actually admitted to what an asshole she was. This wasn't the first time. She actually hounded him and asked so many questions on his personal life that wasn't really her business. I don't know how the men in this series tolerate their heroines. They bug the shit out of me. It isn't so much their actions but the fact that they won't accept accountability for their actions. It's the claim to decency while acting in another way that annoys me. If you're doing something bad, at least own up to it. I was so mad at her when she tracked him down to the homeless shelter and all she wanted to do was leave so she could excuse herself. She also had the gall to act huffy on how he is right. No shit. Her attitude just irks me. The hero's story was adorable. I liked that he was homeless and working his way up. His story as well as Archibald's was so sweet. I liked their tenacity to work their way up again. I liked that he took care of Archibald and was the breadwinner. It was just so sweet and I really wanted the best for him because of his honest works. This is why Wanda bugged the shit out of me. She was so suspicious of him, which was unwarranted. If a person needs a job then he needs a job. She was way out of line discriminating on gender. So what if a man sells cosmetics? I just did not get her unreasonable nature.This is also my problem with the books so far. The conflicts are so manufactured and not organic. The heroines act in a despicable way that is supposedly out of character, that is if they are truly good people. Then if so, it is the writer's fault for not coming up with a better way to write the plot. Even Keith, a character in the book says, better not ask questions, just accept it. This to me translates, I can't think of any other way to write it or explain it.I think that is what is holding the book back. It shows a lack in the author's ability to tell a truly compelling story. With that said, I think it is a good book but could have been a lot better.

  • Terisa
    2019-01-24 23:09

    The Accidental Human is the third book in the Accidentals series and features Wanda. If you’ve read the first two books in the series, you’ve already figured out that something was wrong with Wanda. She’s lost weight and often looks tired.Wanda Schwartz has finally made it into the big leagues by selling Bobby Sue Cosmetics, she’s surpassed all of the goals that she set forth to conquer including receiving her sky blue convertible and she’s determined to keep going until she discovers that she is terminally ill. Wanda had already planned the recruiting meeting the day that she received the life changing news and she had a record number of women that had already confirmed to attend as well as one man. Who is this man and why is he so determined to sell makeup? Does he really have what it takes and will he be the first ever man to ever sell Bobbie Sue cosmetics?Heath Jefferson needs money and he needs it yesterday so when he sees the add in the paper that he can make as much as $5,000 a month by selling makeup, he’s determined to do anything that he has to in order to get started. Only problem is that he has absolutely no prior experience, no money, no credit and no way to get started. He does however have a will to succeed and needs to find a way to get Wanda on board to give him a chance. He has all of the other women falling at his feet at the meeting but it’s obvious that she’s not going to be as easy. She’s the only one that he’s out to impress and it’s not just because she holds the key to him succeeding either, there is something about her that makes him want to show him that he can succeed.I enjoyed this book more than book two even though it covers a serious illness which could end Wanda’s life. You see a side to Wanda that you have caught glimpses of in the past books and she’s finally come into her own. She’s no longer afraid to stand up for herself and can talk smack as well as Nina and Marty even without using cuss words. You would think that a person with a werewolf and vampire as best friends that the news that you were dying wouldn’t be that big of deal but Wanda isn’t your average person. She doesn’t like to tempt fate and asking her friends to save her would be doing that. All that changes though when she falls in love but it’s Nina and Marty’s constant arguing that screws even that up. I look forward to reading more books in the series.

  • Lady Ozma
    2019-02-03 00:03

    I have really loved the Accidental series this year! This was a great way to get the last of our three gals into the Super-world! I love that Wanda is still working hard at her Bobbie Sue and talk about the adventure it takes her on! It gave her the strength and self confidence she needed to regain after her ex left her in a mess, and now she's a woman on her own ready to do what's necessary. At least, until she's diagnosed with a terminal illness. She moves to the great land of De Nile for some of this book as well as throws herself a Pity Party. Talk about your best written stages of grief book! Lucky for Wanda, on the heels of her doctor's dismal diagnosis, she meets herself a hunky man - the catch is he isn't all he appears to be AND he wants to sell Bobbie Sue.What's a dying girl to do but help out the hunky man with his difficult career choice?

  • Morgan
    2019-02-19 23:02

    I found this installment sliiiightly more interesting if only for Wanda growing a backbone and finally telling the other two how ridiculous they are sometimes. haha.Wanda finds out that she's terminally ill, takes on a new Bobbie Sue recruit who is a man, and keeps her impending doom a secret from her newly immortal friends. The book introduced some interesting new characters that kept things interesting/amusing. I also laughed a lot more with #3 than I did with any of the others (including #4). This one would have been bumped up to a 3.5 or maybe even a generous 4 if it hadn't been for the conclusion. (Because you can't truly expect a person with immortal best friends to die of cancer, can you?) Her survival wasn't the issue, but the WAY the author saved her was disappointing. I expected better, book #3.

  • Amanda
    2019-02-01 18:01

    This is book three in the series, and after reading Nina's Story I was wondering where is the author going to take this one. What she came up with was very much worth my reading because the humor is just great. I don't think I have found another author who's love for the F-word beat mine. It was nice to see that Wanda grew into the voice and back bone she did because I truly hated the way Nina talked to her. And I loved that in the end Wanda could kick some serious butt of both NINA and MARTY. Very funny stuff. It was a little quick and it wrapped up with a nice big bow of I saw that coming but still it was my favorite in the whole series. I recommend these books to people who likes to sink into a very far fetched book with a happy ending.

  • Danielle
    2019-02-02 16:49

    I absolutely loved Accidentally Dead by Dakota Cassidy but this book was an utter and complete disappointment. Could we not have thought up a new way to save Wanda rather than resorting again to the Vampire and Werewolf nation. In Accidentally Dead and the Accidental Werewolf, both female characters were spunky and had attitudes that were unique but in this book we see Wanda mimicing Nina's (from Accidentally Dead) Bronx spunk so much that it made the story unbelievable. I had no desire to finish reading the story at all because it was a mere imitation of the previous books in the series. Even the ending of the book showed the author's inability to develop a new idea. This book took away from the what I originally thought was a great, new, hilarious supernatural romance.

  • Rebecca
    2019-02-09 17:58

    Book three of the Accidental Friends triology. And my favorite. Wanda was always the one I could fully relate to and so to finally read her story, I knew something was up in Nina's book because Wanda was always so tired.I loved this book...again, a rare instance where I am moved to tears. Heath is a fabulous leading man and the one I think is the best of the three. Granted, the ending was fabulo-so! But be prepared to have your tears jerked, ladies and have a box of tissues ready for the last quarter of the book.

  • Amy
    2019-02-11 17:45

    (Im a spoiler(and 'spoiler' is just an understatement)!!..Beware)You've seen it in the last book.Im becoming ill each day.Dying of cancer and hiding it from my friends.Just when love makes its way back into my life.Great timing.Ending: Wanda and Heath are mated and both werevamps.Keegan and Marty have a baby and are happily still mated.And Nina & Greg are happily still mated.Its a HEA for all.Characters:Wanda Schwartz: the best saleswoman in Bobbie-Sue cosmetics,thin,round butt,blue eyes,full lips,chestnut hair,has a Bobbie-Sue in-home party,is dying of cancer(keeps the secret from her two bffs but tells them later),ex is a podiatrist(divorced),is planning on sending Heath to Linda and also resign from Bobbie-Sue b/c shes gunna die(which she did),makes a f*** list for her to do the stuff she never had the balls to do(the first thing on her list was to make love),stalks Heath(is suspicious of him),made love to Heath,made up her mind to get Marty or either Nina to change her(which she did and when Marty bit her nothing happened so Nina did also..and then something happened),got turned into a werevamp which is bad b/c tht means shes rabid and is confused and on overload which her body cant handle(the cure is to give her the blood of an innocent human),is a werevamp(huge in shift form and also has fangs huge as elephant tusks and is ten times as powerful as Nina and Marty),wrote ideas for a book titled 'Being Paranormal for Dummies'.Heathcliff Jefferson: was a vampire(was thirty six when bitten and is a hundred and ninety nine yrs old),his original-original sire(as in his sire's sire's sire) was killed(and that turned whoever he turned.. and whoever they turned..and so on back into a human),disowned by his parents when they found out what he was(they're dead now),Wanda's new recruit,first ever male color consultant at Bobbie-Sue,shows up at Wanda's in-home party(had the whole party's attention b/c of his looks and knowing of makeup),liquid silk voice, dark blond head,broad shoulders,hazel eyes frindged with long and thick lashes,thin scar by his left eye,sharp handsome features,bottom lip is full,makes a deal with Wanda since he doesnt have enough for the starter kit(If he gets twenty people to buy the $500 starter kit in a week then she gets part of the percentage and get him one),owns a Yugo(they dont even have those anymore),charmed his way backstage to the The Miss New Jersey TransAmerica contestants and sold twenty-three starter kits(broke the record in the history of Bobbie-Sue),kissed Wanda for the first time when she let him stay over b/c it was too late and cold to drive(Heath broke it),found out at the last minute he was being given to Linda but it was too late,made a plan to get Wanda to go out with him(its why he asked her not to retire from Bobbie-Sue for one more week and teach him how to apply makeup and get him cetified),is living so far in a Atman’s Homeless Shelter for Men(he is selling Bobbie-Sue to get an apartment),making coffee for Wanda and saw her f*** it list(saw # one and it said she wanted to do him),made love to Wanda at her place,fav candy is Reeces Peanut Butter Cup,gets Nina and Marty's phone # off Wanda's phone when she was tlking to Arch(hes gunna try asking them for help to see whats wrong w/ Wanda),found out about Nina and Marty himself(like what they are) and also found out Wanda was dying(he was retriving her purse when the doctor left a message for her),fav color is blue,sacrifices himself for Wanda to save her(survived),when giving his life to Wanda she bites him(which she is suppose to do) so that makes him turn out to be a werevamp just like her at the end.Archibald Crane: Heath's friend(Heath’s manservant),seventy,wrinkles on his forehead,dark eyes,british accent,was used by Heath as a dummie for him to pratice makeup on,flipped a lady the bird b/c she kept gawking at him b/c hes in a Yugo that is wrapped with a girly logo,is living so far in a Atman’s Homeless Shelter for Men,comes from a family of British descent..most of whom served royalty in one way or another.Menusha: Wanda's cat,fluffy,faithless slut,big green eyes.Horatio: the vampire who turned Heath and Arch(he pissed her off and he attacked out of nowhere..if not for Arch he'd end up dead-dead instead of undead),is dead-dead(killed by a log while driving).Mrs.Schwartz: lives in Florida.Casey Schwartz: Wanda's young sister,lived in Manhattan.Nina Statleon: turned vampire,mate of Greg,helps Wanda stalk Heath, smelled something different about Heath.Greg Statleon: vampire,mate of Nina,helps find out more about Heath's clan to confirm that he was once a vampire,when finding out about all the vamps that were turned back to human and how most of them are wondering the streets with no money he trys to track as many as he can and help,comes to Wanda's when called by Nina(it was about Wanda and how the biting went wrong). Svetlanna: vampire,Greg's mother,lets most of the ex-vamps work for her at Fango.Lou: Nina's grandmother,finally knows about the paramornal world Nina and Greg are involved in(Nina got help from Wanda and Marty to tell her..and she took it way better than they expected),likes Arch.Marty Flaherty: turned werewolf,married to Keegan,is pregnant,helps Wanda stalk Heath,offered Heath a position at Pack Cosmetics(so he quit and left Linda Fisher to come to Pack).Keegan Flaherty: werewolf,married to Marty,comes to Wanda's when called by Marty(it was about Wanda and how the biting went wrong),lets most of the ex-vamps work for him at Pack Cosmetics.Hollis: werewolf,Keegan's and Marty's baby girl,dark hair,was born in the back of Wanda's sky blue convertible,looks like Keegan.Muffin: Marty's teacup poodle.Harry Stein: Wanda's neighbor,eighty.Mindy: one of Wanda's attendees at her in-home party,a well-dressed redhead with flowing,curly hair,long lean fingers,ice blue almond shape eyes.Joe: one of The Miss New Jersey TransAmerica contestants,a he,one of the people that bought the starter kit from Heath.Linda Fisher: one of Bobbie-Sue saleswoman,divorced,doesnt mind stealing accounts,kissed Heath the day he was given to her(was tlking to him about her divorce and how lonely she was and then bam! poped one on him).George: a podiatrist,divorced but married again,Wanda's ex(dumped her for another woman that only likes him for his money).Darcy: George's new wife,had an affair with George when he was married to Wanda.Warren Snelling: made Wanda's life a hell in seventh and eighth grade(he showed the whole class her booblessness),attended Our Lady of Perpetual Aid Catholic School in Point Pleasant,married,redhead,pudgy freckled face,received a call from Wanda(he was number ten on her list to take care of).Attila: the homeless shelter coordinator,was distracted by Nina and Marty so that Wanda can past through.Dr. Eckert: doctor,calls all the time to get Wanda comfortable on her 'last stages of life'.Ernie: werevamp,is the reason why Heath knows alot about werevamps, lives in Oshkosh,nice guy,bit his ex-mother-in-law to savehimself,can only have blood or rare/beefy meat(thats the only things he can hav b/c hes a werevamp).Facts from the book:-There is a way to get your mortal-self back.And that is to kill the original creator of your clan.But if you do that not only you turn back but also all the vampires in the bloodline.

  • Brandi
    2019-01-29 00:12

    Wanda jumped into Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics with two feet and is kicking butt and taking names. She is working her way up the ladder much to Marty's delight. Unfortunately, Wanda has a secret she is keeping from Marty and Nina. No matter what the werewolf and vampire do, Wanda refuses to budge. While conducting her recruiting drive for Bobbie-Sue, Wanda does the impossible, she recruits a man. Yes a MAN!! A drop dead gorgeous, British accented, man named Heath who seems to have an unwordly obsession with Reese's Cups. She thinks he's playing her. He shows up to her pitch for Bobbie-Sue in her house and he listens to everything she has to about the company and nails it. Heath has the touch. He proves it by helping the ladies in her house by helping them with picking colors in their color wheels. Wanda doesn't know what to do. She's even more stumped when Heath can't pay for his starter kit. He makes a deal that if he can sell the required kits in less than a week, Wanda pays for his kit for him and they move forward. Boy, does Heath deliver. Heath certainly knows how to think outside of the box. The chemistry between Wanda and Heath leaps off the page. While navigating what is going on with herself, helping Heath with his career with Bobbie-Sue and trying to keep Nina and Marty from finding out what is wrong with her, Wanda is juggling a lot of balls in the air. Unfortunately, those balls get all mixed up and jumbled and they start to cross and get mixed up. Things happen and Wanda's world turns upside down even more. Somehow, Heath knows more than he is letting on with the world that Marty and Nina belong to. But how and why? What's his story? When Marty and Nina find out what Wanda's secret is World War III breaks out, okay .. so it doesn't but something happens. And boy, it is a dozy. To find out, you need to get the book and find out how this trio of best friends figure out how to deal with something that could tear them apart.

  • Gwen S.
    2019-02-04 00:12

    Heath and Wanda HEA! 3.25*****The most stable character of the trio, Wanda, now Bobbie Sue's most productive rep has gotten her blue Cadillac, and is given a death sentence. We see how she handles her final moments of her life, while coaching Heath, her newest recruit and former vampire. Working together he shows her to be less gender biased, and to think outside the box. In the process, they fall in love with each other and with life or soon the lack of it, in Wanda's case. She finally capitulate and tells her two paranormal sidekicks, Nina and Marty, who come to her rescue, botching up the eternal life conversion creating a rabid Wanda werevampire. The clans, packs, and respective husbands come in to quell the situation, but it is Heath who gives up his new found joy and addiction of Reese Peanut Butter, cheese logs, whoppers, and the Sun's warmth, by reverting back into a werevamp to be with his soul mate... HEA. The new characters, Archibald and especially Heath tackle their poverty and situation with dignity and a certain 'never say die' attitude, which was refreshing to read. Wanda's newly expanded, Nina-like language made up for Nina's scarcity throughout the novel. A fun quick read!

  • Dahlya
    2019-01-23 17:07

    OK, i love that the author writes women in a realistic fashion, however, much like in real life, that reality does become obnoxious. Nina stopped being bold and strong, and has become pig headed and loud. Marty was nice and calm and is now more how Nina initially was. Wanda's all over the map. I just feel like these ladies are loosing their individual identities and all becoming Snooky circa Jersey Shore. I found myself just skipping pages and pages of text and not even missing a bit of the plot, which makes me super sad because I was loving binging this series. Maybe that was a mistake. Maybe these ladies were not meant to be binged. I'm still hooked but i really hope, they stfu, as they all like to say.

  • Holley
    2019-01-20 22:04

    It started out pretty good with interesting characters and some funny dialogue. Then it took a wrong turn. It almost seemed like the author couldn't figure out how to get out of the corner she put herself in without resorting to cliche plot devices. Sigh. I will probably read the next one because it is on my bookshelf (gasp a physical book), but I'm guessing I will give up on the series after that.

  • Katrina Berry
    2019-02-07 20:59

    Wow...just wow. This was an okay read for me. Nothing fantastic. I just wasn't into the couple and felt no investment in them. Also the whole cancer issue was a huge downer to the storyline and not at all something I really want to read about in what is supposed to be considered a lighthearted romance. And the ending...really?

  • Nancy
    2019-01-19 16:44

    Oh my gosh, I am pretty sure Wanda is my favorite character so far, I was so happy she got her happy ending and really loved the unique story so got. It was something completely different that I was not expecting and loved how it was done! I can't wait to read more!

  • Starry
    2019-02-04 18:45

    Wanda Schwartz is raking in the dough selling Bobbie-Sue Cosmetics-and she's a pro at recruiting new saleswomen. So, she's shocked when a man comes to one of her in-home parties-a very hot man. Heath Jefferson is sure to put some extra spin into a lot of women's color wheels.When Wanda is diagnosed with a terminal illness, it doesn't have to be a death sentence. With a werewolf and a vampire for best friends, she has options that most ordinary people wouldn't. As Wanda ponders what to do about her mortality, Heath reveals he has secrets, and one of them is that his former bloodlust has turned into an old-fashioned lust-for Wanda. And he's already given up too much to lose the love of his lifetimes._______________________________________________________________________menusha-wanda's catArchibald-heath's friendwanda gets a call from a man about her ad.weird.usually only women call her about the ad(the ad is selling cosmetics at bobbie-sue to earn up to 2to 5 grand a month).his name is heath jefferson, and he wants to work at bobbe-sue cosmetics and sell makeup to earn cash cause he's kinda broke.wanda invites heath to her bobbie-sue intro party so that he can learn alittle about bobbie-sue and how to sell makeup.wanda is sad cause she has diagnosed with a terminal illness.and that means she can die.but wanda's too scared to ask nina and marty for help and change her.when heath came, all the women fell flat over heels for him and heath knew his color wheels as if he lived to sell makeup.heath doesnt have enough money to pay for the starter's kit to start bobbie-sue, so he makes a deal with wanda:if he can make twenty other women buy bobbie-sue's starters kit in a week, then wanda can take a portion of the money earned and buy him a kit.wanda in the end accepts the deal.Archibald and heath live together in a stinky place cause thier broke.their only hope left is for heath to get a bobbie-sue job and earn up to 2 through 5 grand a month.the next day heath sold over 23 starters kit.wanda hands heath over to linda fisher since wanda knows shes ganna die and then she can't be teaching heath anymore.wanda quits bobbie-sue.heath convinced wanda to hold off her first week of resigning and help him practice makeup b4 she can resign and he can go on his own.wanda makes a list of things that are way out of what she was planning to do b4 her life was over.wanda finds out that martys having a baby.wanda takes nina and marty with her to spy on heath and find out where he lives and talk to heath.so they find out that he lives at "Atman’s Homeless Shelter For Men".and that he has a manservant names arch.and that heath's real name is heathcliff.and that heath knows about the things to do b4 wanda dies list(heath was number 1 on the list and it said that wanda wants to do him b4 she dies).heath tells wanda that he use to be a vampire.his sire diedcause he was staked while he was driving by another truck on accident, and that turned everyone that he turned, and those that were turned by the turned ones, back into human.heath wonders why wanda didnt freak out and all after he told her she was a vampire.every sane person in the world would have freaked out at least once, but wanda barly batted an eyelash when he told her he was an ex-vampire.heath was there when wanda had those "Stomach achs".and he knows shes hiding more than she lets him know, and he plans to find out what shes hiding.heath took wanda's friends phone #s while she was talking to arch.heath meets up with marty and nina and they talk about what might be wrong with wanda and her stomach achs/cramps.heath finds out that wanda is dieing, because when heath went back to wanda's house to get her purse for her, he heard a message from a doctor saying that wanda's ganna go through her last stage of life.wanda later on tells nina and marty to bite her, and marty and nina both end up biting her because they thought that marty did the process wrong.and keegan and greg end up coming to wandas house to see marty and nina on top of a gigantic werevamp(which is wanda) and heath ends up risking his life to wanda to save her so that she wont be rabid and heath ends up living still after wanda bit him not knowing that she did.7 months later.....marty and keegan have a baby girl Hollis whoses a few weeks old.keegan, greg, and heath and the girls have been putting up ads around for ex-vamps to call and let them help the ex-vamps adjust to their human lives, get them jobs, and make sure their sucessful and lovin their new life.the birth of Hollis didnt turn out as planned ina hospital, but it did make it to a dollar general b4 the baby came out of marty.nina have finally told Lou, her grandmother about her and greg(that their vamps) with the help of marty and wanda, and Lou took it pretty well.then later on Lou meant Archibald and they've been like best buds ever since.Wanda took all her lists that she made and putted it all into a book that she called "Being Paranormal for Dummies" and shipped it off to an agent.and then her new agent told her that some author who likes crazy paranormal books wants to buy wanda's book from her.heath proposes to wanda.#178

  • Lj Ducharme
    2019-02-05 21:47

    As always ... a fun paranormal romantic romp with a side of snark.

  • John Piper
    2019-02-14 16:08

    Hilarious series!

  • Danielle
    2019-02-11 22:01

    It is extremely hard for a book to make me cry, but this book came pretty darn close.

  • Alicia
    2019-01-22 21:46

    I liked this book and have decided to continue reading the series. Which is strange considering I didn't like the first book in the series.

  • Brenda Santana
    2019-02-05 17:48

    When you want to read something that is not intense or serious this is a great book. I️ enjoyed this book because it was cute, funny and a nice break from reality.

  • Starr
    2019-02-02 16:00

    Sooo funny! The ending was a little rushed and didn't make a lot of sense but the LOL moments made up for it.