Read On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross David Kessler Online


Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's On Death and Dying changed the way we talk about the end of life. Before her own death in 2004, she and David Kessler completed On Grief and Grieving, which looks at the way we experience the process of grief. Just as On Death and Dying taught us the five stages of death -- denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance -- On Grief and GrieviElisabeth Kübler-Ross's On Death and Dying changed the way we talk about the end of life. Before her own death in 2004, she and David Kessler completed On Grief and Grieving, which looks at the way we experience the process of grief. Just as On Death and Dying taught us the five stages of death -- denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance -- On Grief and Grieving applies these stages to the grieving process and weaves together theory, inspiration, and practical advice, including sections on sadness, hauntings, dreams, isolation, and healing....

Title : On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 8876691
Format Type : Kindle Edition
Number of Pages : 205 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss Reviews

  • Leonard
    2019-06-18 05:43

    A powerful guide to grieviElizabeth Kubler-Ross applies the Five Stages model from her book On Death and Dying to grieving. Those who grieve while a loved one is dying or afterwards also struggle with denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. While she confronts her own death, Ms. Kubler-Ross, together with co-author David Kessler, shares the inner and outer worlds of grief. For those who have grieved, some and perhaps many of the issues are familiar. We may be emotionally drained; we may feel relieved to see our loved one no longer suffering but then guilt may overwhelm us. During anniversaries and holidays, we would be especially pained. The book helps us grapple with our grieving and lets us know that we are not alone in the struggles. For those who are grieving as well as those who had grieved and those who will grieve. ng.

  • Laura
    2019-05-31 04:07

    This book served to be my guide to surviving my mother's death without feeling alone, misunderstood, helpless, or -worse- hopeless. This book has validated all the emotions I've felt in my devastating loss by seeing life and death, love and grief through almost every perspective. "On Grief and Grieving" defines all five stages of loss (denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance), while also addressing and defining grief from a variety of perspectives (when a person dies from suicide, accidents, murder, Alzheimer's, and many other conditions and actions.) Further, this book explains that many experiences other than death deserve the grieving process and mourning, such as divorces, job losses, or any other large, life impacting, negative event. Of course this isn't to imply that "On Grief and Grieving" suggests a person live life as a pessimist, relishing in sad thoughts, but rather this book insists that we fight the endless cultural cues to minimize our grief by "being strong" or "bucking up." Kubler-Ross and Kessler demand that we recognize how validating grief is to our mental health, work through it at our own paces without focusing on an end, because grief is not a process. They write, "Grief is not just a series of events, stages or time lines. Our society places enormous pressure on us to get over loss, to get through the grief. But how long do you grieve for a husband of fifty years, a teenager killed in a car accident, a four-year-old child: a year? five years? forever? The loss happens in time, in fact in a moment, but it's aftermath lasts a lifetime." Therefore, do not limit your grief, do not pressure yourself to limit your grief, nor should you ever deny your grief. "To deny grief," according to this book, "is to deny the love" you shared with the one you lost. To deny your grief, is to deny the love that was shared in a lost marriage. As the author's write in "On Grief and Grieving", "Why grieve? For two reasons. First those who grieve well, live well. Second, and most important, grief is the healing process of the heart, soul, and mind; it is the path that returns us to whole-ness."And ultimately, through proper grieving you will realize that you will survive and eventually again find happiness.

  • Amber
    2019-06-12 01:46

    I "really liked" this book as much as you can about a book on loss and grief. I highly recommend it for anyone who is going through grief because of losing a loved one. I was really reading this to familiarize myself with what a close friend is going through at the moment, but found that it was quite insightful for me, as someone who has also experienced the loss of loved ones. It made me see myself as someone who wasn't totally crazy at the time of my grief. I also realized that someone could be experiencing loss not JUST because someone has DIED. But losing a close relationship in general can oftentimes push us into stages of grief.The authors of this book seem very level-headed and not stuck on the idea of medicating and "moving on" so quickly. They encourage the idea of "feeling"--something that is so often lost in today's society. They do not try to shove some religious view down your throat, but at the same time have you consider those moments of experiencing a supernatural occurrence as one to think about, process, and decide how it makes you FEEL, rather than if it was "real" or not. The idea that one of the very authors died during the writing of this book, makes it that much more "believable" and certainly close to home for the reader.

  • Kim
    2019-06-06 05:12

    Here's what my three stars mean for this book:I found this book helpful and problematic. It was mostly helpful in presenting a sort of map of grief, a list of possible ways that grief will manifest itself in the life of the griever and some nuggets of wisdom for living through that process. It also contained helpful affirmations - you're going to feel isolated from other people in the grieving process, that's okay, people experience loss differently, etc. I found it most helpful to read this book for the nuggets I found most helpful/memorable/that resonated most in the moment, and highlighting them so that if I needed to I could go back and be reminded of them.Here's what annoyed me about reading this book cover to cover:- NOT EVERYONE IN THE WORLD IS STRAIGHT FOR FUCKS SAKE! God. - this book focuses completely on death ignoring other kinds of grief, so if you are reading it post break-up, post important friendship ending, you're gonna have to do some translating.- it further overwhelmingly focuses on the death of romantic, married, hetero partners after long illness. Not one of the stories is about a queer couple or an unmarried couple unless it happens to be one of the few about losing a parent, friend or grandparent. This meant that I consistently had to swallow my frustration and anger about this biased representation of loss to appreciate what wisdom this book has.- the perspective of the authors is Christian. While they don't bludgeon you with this and do acknowledge other belief systems, including atheism, as a non-Christian I was really aware that they were working with and writing from the assumption of a Christian after-life.I think this book has some really helpful stuff in it, but be warned, these things will also be part of reading the book.

  • Elizabeth
    2019-05-26 07:10

    Still processing and reflecting about this one. Such an insightful, thought-provoking, and heart-rending discourse on an event/events everyone will undergo eventually.

  • Aoife Lennon
    2019-06-16 06:11

    "Grief is the intense emotional response to the pain of a loss. It is the reflection of a connection that has been broken. The reality is you will grieve forever." By coincidence, I have finished this book on the months mind of someone very dear to me and is also my first significant loss. In short I needed this book at this time - I will probably buy my own copy as I found it very comforting and very powerful.

  • Jana Collins
    2019-05-28 06:04

    I read this book twice this year, a year that has been very difficult with the loss of my mother in law, dad, and beloved 16 yo pet. I like the main message of the book which is that everyone’s grief experience is their own and people grieve differently. Grief has no timeline and it can hit you when you least expect it-a song, a memory, an experience. I highly recommend this book.

  • Mark Cape
    2019-05-28 04:58

    A powerful important book - I read it after my best friend - soul companion - child - animal friend got bitten by a cobra here in Cape Town. I burned so deep - the book put a new ground under me. Grief is such a little word for such and immense thing. I am still amazed at what it really is - a given and absolute - so weird that out of the blue there is such a thing as venom and other things custom designed by nature to shut a whole world down - sometimes within minutes. This is the world were in and the peace we must make with such a little word.. G.. R.. I.. E.. F- a universe. The book is real and not the cosmetic anaesthetic that religion gives (personal view - for me) - I needed the depth and truth that I found in this book and ultimately the great paradox it delivers - the closer you get to see your mortality and preciousness of your life and all your relationships the bigger and deeper and richer it gets. That's the beauty. Great book - great author

  • Leila Summers
    2019-06-05 04:01

    Of all the books I devoured after my husband passed away, this one was most helpful to me. While many of Kübler-Ross' books focus on the dying, this book is for those of us who are left behind to grieve and find our way through an unimaginable and indescribable loss.On Grief and Grieving begins by describing the five stages of grief which include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. These can last for different periods of time, or we can go through all of them in one day. This book helped me to understand the path of grief that I was walking. For the first time, I could identify with every feeling and situation described. It was a great comfort to know that my feelings were normal and that I was not alone. Grief is a part of the healing.

  • Tchatchke
    2019-06-03 07:59

    Helpful, but did not need the part about the afterlife. That could have been in another book, one I could have avoided.

  • Michelle
    2019-06-16 03:09

    Once again Elisabeth Kubler-Ross has touched my life and my reading list. Years ago, when I was a new nurse, I read On Death and Dying and learned so much about how to care for those in their last weeks, days, hours. Elisabeth's life work regarding the process of death was a remarkable study for me and I have never forgotten it and how it helped me learn compassion and caring.And now I reach out to her work again, because it is familiar and I know it will help. This book has been a constant companion for me over the last month in dealing with the loss of my mom. Every time I find myself sad or having a bad moment I would pick up this book and find meaning and solace. Although I am finished reading it now, I will keep it with me and refer back to it many times I am sure. Thank you are greatly missed.

  • Candice
    2019-06-07 05:45

    A good friend from my young widowed support group strongly recommended this book to us, and knowing the god-like stature Elisabeth Kubler-Ross has in the field of death and dying, I had very high expectations of this book. I have to say, though, it didn't live up to my hopes. While what it says is accurate, the book felt too glib to me, like an inspirational Cliff's Notes version of grief. I expected more. Perhaps it's just that I've read other grief books that have done the topics more justice, in more detail and using more resonating examples and wording. This book seemed like a good one to give to someone who knows someone who is grieving but who isn't necessarily grieving him or herself, or else for someone very early on in the grieving process, to give an idea of what the grieving person is going or will go through. But as a young widow 2 1/2 years years out at this point (in Feb. 2008) and one who's read a lot of grief books in that time, this one was disappointing. One great frustration I have with so many grief books, including this one, is that they rarely give an accurate depiction--or any indication, period--of just how long grief takes (not that there's ever truly an end) or how long the issues decribed still hold true. And I feel this absence does an injustice to those years out from the death. But that's my own soap box. I also have strong conflicting opinions on the five stages of loss in general because they're so horribly misunderstood and misinterpreted by people not in grief, which could also have contributed to my mixed antipathy to this particular book and the authors.Many kudos, though, to Ross and Kessler for including a section on sex and grief; I haven't seen that topic in many grief books and it certainly deserves attention. And I include a caution, too--the authors include as a fundamental premise for all they write that there's an afterlife and a god. While it's not religiously framed, it could be a potential turnoff to those in grief who don't believe in an afterlife or who are questioning their fundamental beliefs.

  • María José
    2019-05-28 06:08

    Este libro es bastante simple y accesible. A algunos les puede parecer un poco sensiblero y con alguna falta de rigor científico. Sin embargo, es una obra imprescindible para acercar los diferentes aspectos del duelo a la población en general. Ésto es algo que es muy difícil de hacer, ya que nadie quiere saber nada de esto hasta que le toca, y cuando le toca a alguien cercano, es difícil saber lo que hacer precisamente porque uno no ha querido detenerse mucho en pensar en ello. No es muy infrecuente encontrar a gente que no se comunica con alguien que ha sufrido una pérdida porque no sabe "qué decir".Elisabeth Kübler-Ross retoma las cinco etapas que describió en su primer libro sobre los pacientes con enfermedades terminales que había observado, y las describe aplicadas a las personas que ha sufrido una pérdida: negación, ira, negociación, depresión y aceptación. Después dedica una parte del libro a reflexionar en capítulos cortos sobre diferentes aspectos del mundo interior de las personas que se ven afectadas por la pérdida, cuál puede ser su evolución y cuál la mejor manera de gestionarlos para pasar el duelo de forma constructiva. Aquí habla incluso de las experiencias de comunicación con los seres queridos muertos que la gente le ha contado que ha tenido. Sobre esto concluye que no es una cuestión de que sea real o no, sino de aceptar que es una experiencia subjetiva real para el que está pasando por el duelo, que le puede proporcionar consuelo, y hay que juzgarla como tal. Este nivel de compasión junto con la claridad psicológica de que hace gala es la que hacen de este libro algo tan útil cuando uno se enfrenta al duelo, propio o ajeno.La última parte del libro trata en su mayoría de cómo afecta la muerte y el duelo al mundo exterior: las comidas, el dinero, el sexo, etc. Estas son cuestiones prácticas que tal vez a veces sea tabú mencionar, ya que se consideran demasiado poco importantes frente a la muerte que ha ocurrido. Sin embargo la autora las trata con la necesaria normalidad, y ésto también eleva al libro en mi opinión.En suma, un libro muy necesario, no sólo en caso de duelo propio.

  • Meredith
    2019-06-10 07:58

    I couldn't be more disappointed in this book. After losing my 33 year old best friend to cancer, I looked to this book as an ultimate source to help me learn about my grief, given Kübler-Ross' reputation. 'On Grief and Grieving' was dubbed "the definitive account of how we grieve" by The New Yorker, as per the cover, so I was excited for what it might offer me. What I found was a poorly written, God-heavy piece, with entire chapters on angels and the afterlife that don't even make reference to the fact that some people may not believe in these things. Here's an excerpt, for example: "After death, you will also experience a review of your life...You will be asked how much did you love and how much service did you do for mankind." Since when can a statement like that be made in a book meant as a study on grief, as opposed to a religious guide?Further, the book suggested offensive and silly ideas, such as a grieving spouse is likely to lose most of his or her couple friends. As part of a couple who has and will continue to remain quite close with my friend's husband, and as someone who has seen so many of his other couple friends rally around him, I recognize just how wrong this suggestion is.Lastly, I find that the way a book is written can help me connect to it, or can pull me out of it. I have read few books of this stature that were written so poorly. I am shocked at the editing, and again and again found myself re-reading sentences because they were written so badly. Overall, I found the book too anecdotal, religion heavy, poorly written and generally incredibly disappointing.

  • Michelle Mailloux
    2019-06-13 08:45

    This book is titled On Grief and Grieving by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler. This book weaves the theories of death into the 5 stages of grief, along with sharing of the authors’ insight and experiences on life and death. Characters are nonexistent, as the book is more of a reference; reaching an academic publication. Likewise, there is also no setting provided for the reader. The authors expand on the inner and outer worlds of grief, specific circumstances, and the common misconceptions of grief itself. Personally, I loved every bit of this book because it thoroughly defines the stages, while also addressing and defining grief from a variety of perspectives. Furthermore, this book lets the reader know that there are many experiences other than death that deserve to be mourned over. The authors state that, "if you do not take the time to grieve, you cannot find a future in which loss is remembered and honored without pain." They remind us that we will never forget the loss of a loved one and that we will never be the same, they also remind us that we can learn, when our own individual timetable suggests, that it may be possible to find "renewed meaning" in our lives. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has suffered from grief previously, is going through it now, or is experiencing anticipatory grief. Also, adults who have an interest in sociology and death will most definitely love it. Based on my personal opinion of this profound book, I would give it a rating of five stars.

  • Kristena
    2019-06-19 08:48

    Kubler-Ross, a psychiatrist, was the leading expert on death and grief in the field of psychology. This was her last book, co-written with Kessler, a counselor with many years of experience working with the terminally ill and grieving. The book is written in short vignettes that are accessible and easy to read, and the first half of it is excellent. The authors describe the well-known five stages of grief and explain how they are often misunderstood. Kubler-Ross describes our society as death-denying, and she assures the reader that our messy reactions to death are normal. In a way, she has written a handbook for grieving, for those who just don't know how to handle loss or feel like they are “doing it wrong.” The second half of the book goes into more detail about specific kinds of loss (to terminal illness, of a child, by suicide, etc.). At times I believe the authors focus too much on the loss of a spouse, but perhaps that is understandable. Overall the writing is general enough that it applies to other losses as well. Kubler-Ross and Kessler use many real-life examples of people dealing with loss, taken from their combined years of experience dealing with them. This further normalizes the grieving process and makes this a very helpful, insightful book.

  • Cherene
    2019-06-06 03:46

    I would highly recommend this book to everyone! It offers a lot of insight into the grieving process, and explains the stages that people often experience. It is addressed to individuals who have suffered the loss of a loved one, but it will help everyone who reads it to understand their own losses and to be able to help others who are grieving as well. I read it from a counseling perspective because a lot of my clients have experienced significant losses. I would highly recommend it to all counselors who want to understand and appropriately respond to grieving clients. In reading the book, I gained a lot of insight about myself, my life, how I have handled losses, and why I have experienced certain emotions at certain times. The book helped me understand not only my response to the loss of a loved one, but how I have handled other difficult situations in my life as well. It is very easy to read and understand, with many short vignettes that illustrate the various concepts presented. All of us are faced with loss at times in our lives, and all of us will know someone who is going through a difficult loss at some point. This book with help you to get through your own loss better and help you to understand and help your grieving loved ones as well.

  • Bob Grommes
    2019-06-18 08:48

    Kubler-Ross' comprehensive final book, completed shortly before her own death, is about the process of grieving the loss of a loved one -- what to expect, how to cope emotionally. It covers more complicated forms of grief such as the grief surrounding murder and natural disaster. It covers grief and children, grief and sex, grief and pretty much anything remotely related to or impacted by grief.Although the author clearly believes in an afterlife, she writes in a non-sectarian fashion. The book has a nice balance of anecdotal and factual writing and is very approachable.Even though I'm well acquainted with grief and loss issues I learned a few new things from this book.

  •  Gloria MariaVazquez
    2019-06-17 08:58

    This was such an insightful book for me. I highly recommend it to anyone who has gone thru or is presently going thru some sort of loss. Although the authors focused on loss thru death -- those who expierence loss in other ways, such as thru divorce, loss of job, loss of health, can also benefit from the wisdom presented in this book.

  • India
    2019-06-06 07:02

    I know I will read this book again, as I have already, to remind myself that my grief is normal, irrational, explainable and unavoidable. Well provided you aren't a sociopath.

  • Linda
    2019-06-13 01:44

    This book is hard to read. And yet I feel compelled to keep reading even through the tears. There are times I feel I will need to start reading it again as soon as I finish it.

  • The Badger
    2019-06-06 05:56

    The absolute best information regarding grief. A must-have for any counselor or psychologist.Kubler-Ross is outstanding--although you think she'd be over it by now (jk--dark counselor humor)!

  • Gail W
    2019-06-25 10:02

    I truly believe this book may have saved my life

  • Leigh
    2019-06-08 07:04

    I have experienced grief and grieving many times during my career in health care and in my own personal life with the losses of my two remaining grandparents and my mother in just a little over a year. While it's been tough times somehow I've survived. This book which I stumbled on while reading another book was a wonderful guide to grief. If grief can be called wonderful. It sure doesn't feel wonderful. I decided to read this for many reasons. To help me at work with grieving families and residents, and to help myself and my family, some who are having a terrible time in their grief mostly because they believe the things pointed out in this book. Like it's been twenty five years you're still upset your mother died, or when are you going to get over it already. Or my favourite you need to find closure. Trust me you don't and you will never get over a major loss. As the book points out you live with it forever that person will be with you for always. This was a tough book to read at times, it brought me to tears, it tore out my heart brought up memories and in a way helped bring some of my grief to the surface. It also showed that I was normal and even shared similar coping strategies to some of the people shown in the book. And finally I truly understand the five stages as well. I understand the stages when someone is dying, but never fully got them with grief and now I do. I would recommend this to anyone in healthcare and anyone who has suffered a loss especially those who are having a tough time coping with that loss. I know I'll be passing this on to relatives who will no doubt find this book as helpful as I did in helping survive grief.

  • Wendy
    2019-06-25 04:45

    Een  boek dat ik al heel snel nadat ik het begon te lezen besloot om zélf te kopen, het was té herkenbaar, en daardoor troostend.Knap en duidelijk boek over rouw, over de vijf stadia (die niet zozeer 'stadia' zijn, omdat ze niet afgebakend zijn en door elkaar lopen), en over zowat elk mogelijk aspect dat met rouwen te maken heeft.Absolute aanrader voor iemand die zelf in een rouwproces zit, of voor wie iemand die rouw beter wil begrijpen, en/of een ander daarin wil ondersteunen.Er zitten ook stukken over religie, spiritualiteit en het hiernamaals in, waar ik persoonlijk minder mee heb, maar ik snap wel dat de auteurs dat erin gestoken hebben. Voor andere mensen is dit immers wél belangrijk. En die stukken kun je ook gemakkelijk overslaan als het je niet interesseert.Ik las kritiek dat het te vaak zou gaan over iemand die een echtgeno(o)t(e) verliest. Het is waar dat veel van de voorbeelden daarover gaan, maar het kost niet veel moeite om zelf andere voorbeelden te bedenken of de voorbeelden naar je persoonlijke ervaring te herschrijven. Tegelijkertijd blijft rouw zoiets persoonlijks dat het in feite niet uitmaakt welke situatie er beschreven is. Je haalt eruit wat er voor jou in zit, en de herkenbaarheid blijft.Eigenlijk 4,5 sterren, en geen 5, vanwege de paar hoofdstukken die mij persoonlijk iets minder zeiden.

  • Mona AlMuaigel
    2019-05-27 10:07

    Its an amazing book that tells you all the things that you need to know when you loose a loved gave me a huge insight about what I'm going through. Made me feel peace, acceptence and love for myself witout judgments. unfortunately, in our societies we are used to push everthing in and act as if its normal and we ar OK!. come on we are humen beings we have all that feelings for a reeason, we should aknowledge and appriciate those feelings. in my opinion some of the psycological problems that we suufer from is from suppressing those feelings like (anger, pain,sadness,fear).wht I had understood from the writer was that grief is a process and its diffrent from one individual to another each one of us has her own journy to endure. moreover, if we want to grow we have to pass through our storm.I would give this book 7 stars. I higly recommend even if you know someone who lost a loved one and you want to have more understanding about what she or he going through.

  • Rebecca Weinman
    2019-06-07 06:45

    I started reading this as research towards a story I'm writing, and now believe this to be essential and required reading. Though the writing and anecdotes dispersed throughout have a slightly dated feel, this book is nothing short of absolute profundity, and it is littered with my unrestrained highlights of particularly thought-provoking passages and ideas. As someone who is not currently grieving and has not yet experienced a traumatic loss, I feel extraordinarily prepared and will revisit this book when the inevitable losses occur. This book will shift your perspective to not only understand the stages of grief you will undoubtedly experience, but to find beauty and meaning in an otherwise painful process. We should all prepare for death as we do life.

  • Edie
    2019-06-12 01:44

    It is hard to say that this is a good book given the topic but it actually is a good book on dealing with grief on the loss of a loved one. We lost our 46 yr. old daughter on March 29, 2017 and are hurting badly. I am having a more difficult time grieving than is my husband. This book helps to explain the stages of grieving and how you never really get over it but you learn to get on with your life. It also confirms that all loses are grievous but the loss of a child is the worst possible one you can imagine. I will recommend this book to the Grief Group that we just joined and to anyone who is surviving the loss of a loved one

  • Tushar Agrawal
    2019-06-21 09:03

    This is my first read on the topic of death and grieving. Elisabeth Ross is a legendary researcher in this field and her work is simple to read and leaves a strong impression.The core message of the book is that we as human beings follow a certain pattern when we face loss and we need to go through the grieving process to heal ourselves. There is a definite need to talk more about this subject in our society.

  • Lisa
    2019-06-15 06:55

    The power and gift of griefJust when you think you are at your saddest and most desperate pain from a loss, along comes a book that understands you with clear insight and help guides you through to the other side of learning to live without your loved one. This book is not an answer or a fix for your pain as nothing is, but acts like a gentle friend who takes your hand and leads you through your loss.